Simon Cowell to Send Britain's Got Talent Winner into Space

January 20, 2012 By:
Simon Cowell to Send Britain's Got Talent Winner into Space

I understand that Simon Cowell has insane amounts of money, but this is just ridiculous. Simon Cowell wants to send the winner of the upcoming season of Britain’s Got Talent into space with Richard Branson’s Virgin Galactic spaceship.

Uhhh, the world’s economy is the worst it’s ever been, people in Africa don’t even have water, but yeah, let’s spend tens of millions of dollars to send someone into space to sing “My Heart Will Go On” in front of a couple astronauts in zero gravity. This makes so much sense!

Simon Cowell, who has like waterfalls in his living room, wants to improve the winners prize by including a trip to outer space, proving yet again that celebrities are completely out of touch with reality.

Cowell tells UK magazine, The Sun, “Richard Branson is the sponsor of the show with Virgin. We are trying to work out a way so that the winner of the show gets to go up in the spacecraft and will be the first person to perform in space.”

Who are they performing for? The other 3 astronauts and lab mice?! Will this be televised on CNN?! What is Simon talking about!?

“I’m being serious,” says Cowell, “I would go on the spaceship myself – you have to have a lot of training. I love the idea that, if they are up for it, then they have the option of performing in front of the whole plant in space.”

However, he says, they might run into a few problems, especially since Britain’s Got Talent is open to talent other than singing.

“I mean, if you’re a juggler then we’ll need to make heavier balls,” says Cowell.

Oh right, heavier balls! Years of training, zero gravity, NASA…none of that matters, all they’ve got to do is get heavier balls. Done and done. Simon Cowell for space president 2012!

“But I will make it happen,” says Cowell, “If it had been a few years ago Susan Boyle could have been singing Unchained Melody in front of the whole planet. This is worth tens of millions of pounds, but Richard genuinely is up for doing it.”